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*entering any conversation* hello I am the most nervous animal on earth please socialize with me I have nothing to say
butches/studs/mascs of Tumblr planning Halloween costumes: we can't possibly all be werewolves,it's not mathematically possible
Sorry, I started thinking about a massive Halloween party full of butch werewolves and blacked out
when i was a kid i wanted to be a famous youtuber like dan and phil so that people would gay ship me with my irl best friend and we would be sooo weirded out by it and laugh and make videos joking about it but secretly it would make her realize her repressed gay crush on me and i'd help her through her gay crisis and then we would have a sickeningly sweet sappy romance and read fanfiction about ourselves together... anyways just found out she's married to a guy in the mafia now so i probably don't have a chance
this post keeps breaching containment so IMPORTANT CONTEXT. it is HER living out the wattpad fantasy because she got shotgun married and is currently very happy with her honestly very attractive mafia husband. she was neo riche BUT deeply hated by her mother beforehand. it was kind of an arranged marriage situation to begin with so it’s ALMOST like being sold to the mafia if u squint at it from really far away. she also has blonde hair blue eyes and a penchant for messy buns. i on the other hand did infact confess my love to her at age 14 in a public pool and she did subsequently accuse me of faking being bisexual for instagram likes because of it. also i am a man now. she is unaware of this due to the fact that she hates me because she thinks i shit talk her behind her back. which i do. anyways. point is the house always wins. she won. she has the mafioso boyfriend and has happily escaped her abusive mother and now owns three teslas and several properties in puerto rico. i am not the protagonist of this story.














